Yes you thought i was joking when I posted on facebook saying i would blog post this didn’t you? Well here I am and I intend to rant my ass off to the non existant audience I have on wordpress of how I absolutely HATE it when people make things go viral on social network. This is in no way a review, more like a post including my thoughts on the book so far based on what has been revealed on social media and one of my pet peeves about social media too.
For the past two months as I was in Morocco having the time of my life enjoying my summer vacation I was looking into paulo coelho’s new book adultery which i seriously wanted to read and purchase the minute i stepped back in london. Unfortunately it didn’t happen. Whilst I loved reading ‘The Alchemist’ and a few others of his, i grew to hate his latest edition to the shelves in waterstones.
But before I unleash the inner beast in me waiting to rant my head off about why I hate the book or rather the people who made me hate everything about the book and the author and put me in this confused state here is my facebook post:
”Unliking paulo coleho on fcbk is a wise decision i just made. Alhamdulillah now i can stop seeing quotes from that darn book. I really do enjoy reading his books but people killed adultery for me way before it was even released i just cant this is going to turn into a rant. Fyi it is unecessary to take a photo of every quote you feel significant and post it on the internet and ruin the book for others. Idgaf about how you ‘grew spiritually’ after reading the alchemist either. And the motivational quotes about how even when a situation is impossible love builds a bridge…no when its impossible..it is impossible. Love aint got ish on God so don’t tell me love builds a bridge in impossible situations cos it builds deep holes. I sound like im on fire..well no i am but i hate it when people kill books for me. It just becomes irrelevant and im just seeing his brazilian face everywhere makes shit ten times worse. ”
A very wise decision in my opinion. Because everyone has a smartphone nowadays and an instagram account it does not mean we need to post everything that makes us think twice about life or falling in love with the handsome idiot that likes your photo on instagram. Ooook that was an exaggeraton but If the quote is so bloody significant to you that it touched and moved your heart then I’d much appreciate it if you were to just internalize it and write a heart felt diary entry to YOURSELF yes yourself about why it meant so much to you because maybe then it would actually make real changes to your life. Okay okay i wont be extreme it is nice to post something that will make your followers think deeply once in a while something you felt was beneficial and will be to others, but to have nine photos three under three under three with the same book and cup of coffee is obsessive. Get the hell out of here and delete your instagram account now. Your spiritual morning routine of reading paulo coelho’s adultery and drinking a freshly brewed cup of coffee does not need to be published on the internet because matter of fact you probably spent thirty minutes editing that photo on vsco cam and captioning it and hashtagging it making sure paulo coelho features your photo on facebook when really you could have read two chapters from the damn book and finished your coffee.
Point number two, only God knows whether these people have actually fallen in love or not or are currently in love, but again internalize that shit pleaasseeee girl. It is unecessary to kill a book for potential readers who were so engrossed in and hyped for the release until yo dead ass self had to post seven photos one after another previewing extracts from the book, oh and that’s not the last of it nope because posting selfies also need a caption too and adultery love quotes just fit in perfectly..supposedly.
But i’ve decided after seeing reviews about the book, that so far it seems like ive made a fairly decent judgement of the book.
”Waste of time.
It is not a story about love. It’s a story about adrenaline rush and how bit of excitement and doing something different and new with your husband can save your marriage.
Its a story of egoistic and bored woman who has everything- money, lovely kids, bit dull but understanding and loving husband, respectable job. But she is not happy… Kinda depressed, or maybe not really, she is not sure herself. So she goes off and give this ex boyfriend of hers a blowjob on a whim, after interviewing him (oh, he is respectable politician). This was first moment I thought “WTF?” I would believe her behavior, if there would be dinner and bit of wine involved, spark or something. But just like that, ah, just unzip it and there you go!
And then another weird sex fantasy of mister Coelho- she meets him again in some hotel, dreaming about great sex and all she gets is animal anal sex. Worse- she doesn’t like it, feels bad after, and yet she has those romantic ideas in her head, that she is falling in love with him! So, while humiliated, treated like free ride, she goes crazy, texting him, stalking and plotting this absolutely ridiculous plan to get rid of his wife, so she could have him all for herself.
Yeah, but then, she loves her husband. Oh wait, she loves this other guy. Oh wait, she doesn’t love this guy, she just want him, it’s lust. Oh no, wait, she loves him… And so on.
And then she jump off the cliff on parachute with her hubby, gets this adrenaline rush, catharsis, all good again. Blah…
So- book is very uneven. Nice start, thought it will be a nice journey of bored and unhappy woman to find her inner happiness and purpose of life, with some cheating and sex involved. Very wrong. Coelho is mentioning vaguely something about God, but I’m not even sure why. Then he is mentioning stories for kids, but the way he did it is like our happiness should be delivered by this prince we are waiting for, who never shows up. Like our happiness is depended on someone else, like someone else should make us happy. My thoughts? This woman needs a good slap in the head, a hobby, or voluntary work for poor, a purpose. And adrenaline rush- bungee jumping, mountain climbing, some activity (well, she even felt better after a simple run around a lake:).
This book was a huge let down. Pointless book about nothing really. Cos sure as hell it’s not about love”
basically a book which makes you feel a few tingly feelings down there and makes you think you feel love, a common human problem amongst many, but i will read the book despite it being killed for me cos literally just reading in total thirty quotes from people’s selfies and then images of two double pages was enough for me to understand who linda flipping was and what issues she has with her husband and this was before reading any reviews. So I will read it and after write an actual review either scrapping my current thoughts or writing an overwhelming post about how great it was.
This blog is in quite a mess in the sense that i only post when i need to release some steam, call it anger management i dont know but excuse the bad language here and there it would have been worst but luckily its past my bed time.
Goodnight and whoever is out there posting double pages on their ig.. I see you.